“Personal growth” and “personal transformation” just sound like more narcissistic new-age psychobabble to me sometimes.
Yet change is inevitable, no matter what era you were born in. Things change. We are meant to change, continually, throughout our lives. It is a non-negotiable of psycho-spiritual maturity that we accept this and allow life to teach us and to refine us. We are meant to revise our opinions, our perspective and our behavior over time. We either grow up or we grow down. We learn how to rise above the status quo, or we stagnate.
This becomes painfully obvious during the mid-life transition. You either evolve or devolve then because stagnation stinks!
So, the number one thing I don’t permit my clients to say?
- You are more than your history.
- You are more than your “personality type”.
- You are more than your entrenched opinions.
- You are much more than your habitual emotional responses.
These are powerful influences, tendencies, preferences and habits. They are not “the way you are”. They are the way you have been. They are the way you have behaved.
When clients tell me “that’s the way I am”, I tell them “that’s not the way you are, that is what you have been practicing to date.”
The task of psycho-spiritual maturity is to wrestle with ourselves and change what no longer serves our higher values or developmental stage. We are invited to begin practicing something new, something that allows us to grow. You are designed to be in a continual cycle of change and growth. (Some mild to moderate depressions may be a symptom that you need to grow. You may be "root bound" and need a bigger pot for who you are meant to be now. If a plant is not transplanted to a bigger pot when it needs one, it will not thrive. Have you felt yourself wilting lately? Read more about being root bound here. )
Be aware that you are being bombarded by a media that is selling you a very opposite and immature message about this.
To exist is to change, to change is to mature, to mature is to go on creating oneself endlessly. Henri Bergson
April is national poetry month. What better way to celebrate than to begin with a poem about shedding our former skin and stepping into our larger Self?
Thank you to our local poet, Tracey Lazore!
Where is your life inviting you to expand?
What do you need to “shed” for that to happen?
Do you recognize yourself in Tracey’s poem?
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